Boy, was I confused

So, as I stated in another blog post Angel and I have been cleaning out our shed to make into an office. So, this means we are cleaning through all sorts of matter. We had to go through paperwork we had in an old filing cabinet.

This brought about pictures, bills, contracts, diplomas and old letters. Of course you can imagine that I came across many bills, contracts and diplomas with my birth name on them. (hopefully they will change them to my soon to be legal name) and of course I had old pictures with my birth name. Oh, but then I came across evidence of my confusion before I admitted to myself who I really am.

At one point in time, because I hated my birth name so much and knew it was not me, I decided to change my name. I had a favorite author at the time named Mercedes Lackey (still is one of my favorites) and I think somewhere deep down I knew what was going to happen because I decided my name was going to be Mercedes Storm Seagrave (Seagrave is my father’s name, I never got it when I was born because my parents were not married) But, see I put Storm as my middle name, I could get away with it, because some have thought of it as a nickname for me for years. So I knew I could do it without people asking me why I was picking a male name (though I believe it is not gender oriented)

Of course years later when I made the admission of who I was and how I felt, I knew my name was going to be Storm Marcus Silvermane. Some people ask me how I came up with my name, and I wish I had some heartfelt romantic  reason for what I chose to be identified as for the rest of my life. But, simply, Storm is a nickname I was given years ago because of the temper I had, and Marcus was the name I always wished I had. Silvermane? Well it is not a family name at all, and it is not after the villain Silvermane either. In fact Storm is not after our hero from X-Men either. Silvermane came from one of my characters in a story I wrote. She is a halfling. Half Human and Half White Tiger. Her hair being part human hair and part tiger I described as more like a mane in the way if flowed than anything else, so her last name was Silvermane and I adopted it for myself as well. That is how I got my name, nothing romantic or wildly interesting, but it is mine and I like it, and what is better is that Angel likes it and is willing to take it as her last name as well. So that is good enough for me.

I am glad I am not confused anymore.